JESUS FIRST
We trust today’s message encouraged and guided you in your journey of following Jesus. These notes are meant to help you remember and reflect on the message, help you go deeper into study on the subject, or be used for a sermon group discussion.
Sermon Title: JESUS FIRST
Main Scripture: Matthew 10:32-39
If you’re going through this discussion with a community group this week consider taking the time to read the provided scripture to catch everyone up!
Summary:
Last week we covered, “As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.” The heart of that message was to choose to serve God and Him alone. We also learned to apply that message by being a living example and intentionally teaching our kids to live a life of service unto God. This is something we can do when we start a family as Christians. It certainly will be more difficult though if a parent comes to believe and follow the Lord later on in life and the kids have already grown without a lifestyle of faith in the home. It’s even more difficult when only one spouse or one kid in the home believes in the Lord. The reality is for some, it will be more like “for me and myself, I will serve the Lord.” The entire family serving the Lord is not everyone’s experience and we need to be prepared for this reality.
This is already someone’s story in this room. This is already happening and people have been going through this struggle. I wouldn’t be at peace if we didn’t cover this scripture before closing this series. I don’t want anyone to be surprised and I want us to be prepared to deal with the reality that not all family members are choosing to follow and serve the Lord.
One of the things I love about Jesus is his commitment to not sugarcoat or over-sell the life or experience of being a follower of Jesus. Many times in scripture, Jesus clearly communicates to the disciples the cost of following Him, and these same difficult experiences can happen to us if we remain faithful to him today.
Notes:
Scripture Context
Jesus is about to send out the twelve disciples on a brief mission trip for the purpose of spreading the good news of the Kingdom of God but also to practice what it will be like in the future. Jesus basically gives them a sermon that would help them now and in the future, words they would most likely recall after Jesus ascended into heaven. In our portion today, Jesus warns the disciples that His life, His message, and His commands would cause division and they would face the potential crossroads of choosing loyalty to Him or their families.
Matthew 34:32-39 NLT
Some obvious questions can come up after reading this scripture such as, “Isn’t Jesus the prince of peace? Don’t we find peace in Jesus? Isn’t it a command to love our family, friends, and neighbors?” What does Jesus mean here?
Verse 34
Jesus came to war against wickedness and the devil (1 John 3:7-8).
Jesus brings peace between us and God through his blood shed on the cross for our sins (Col. 1:20). The debt of sin was dealt with by Christ so that when we believe and repent of our sins we are forgiven and at peace with God.
The sword is a symbol that represents conflict and is not meant to be taken literally here. There will be hostility and opposition with those who support the ways of wickedness. “In fact, not only does Jesus not come to eradicate all human conflict but he actually promises hostility (v. 34). His ministry proved so confrontational that he either attracted people to himself or visibly repelled them.” Blomberg, C. (1992). Matthew (Vol. 22, p. 180). Broadman & Holman Publishers.
“A sword divides; so does the truth which Jesus came to bring. It is more important than family unity” (Argyle). But, of course, his coming presents a challenge to which people respond differently. And emotionally, some who oppose Jesus do so passionately, as do those who become his followers. And where strong and opposed feelings are held, conflict is inevitable. Morris, L. (1992). The Gospel according to Matthew (p. 266). W.B. Eerdmans; Inter-Varsity Press.
Luke 2:14 in the KJV has led generations of people celebrating Christmas to promote the false notion that Christ brings “peace on earth, goodwill to men.” Instead, Jesus promises peace on earth to men of goodwill, namely, to “those on whom his favor rests.” To those who welcome him, he offers eirēnē (“peace”—from the Hebrew concept of shālôm). Blomberg, C. (1992). Matthew (Vol. 22, p. 180). Broadman & Holman Publishers.
Verses 35-36
This means our loyalty and love for Christ will be tested within our own families.
Jesus alludes to Micah 7:6 and reiterates the language of verses 21-22 here.
Jesus warns that His coming and His message will cause conflict and divide families. We hope our decision to follow Jesus will impact our families in a positive way but each family member has to decide what they think and believe of Jesus.
Jesus knows this too well. His own family thought he was out of his mind (Mark 3:21) and his own brothers did not believe in him as the Messiah (John 7:5). See Mark 3:31-35 “Who is my mother or brother?”
The conflict isn’t spurred on by being a jerk of a Christian, it’s the response of family members (or anyone close to you) who oppose Jesus and your loyalty to Him. If you’re unloyal to Jesus you won’t face this.
Following Jesus and following the Word of God is considered extreme to the world who wishes to be free to do whatever they want to do.
Verse 37
Jesus knew that his disciples and future disciples could crack under pressure from family and want to stop the uncomfortable conflict so He warned them of these strong words.
He (Jesus) assumes that there will be love between parents and children, but claims for himself a higher place in his disciples’ affection than that which they accord to their nearest and dearest on earth, and that in a society that held it a dreadful thing to put anyone higher than one’s parents. Morris, L. (1992). The Gospel according to Matthew (p. 267). W.B. Eerdmans; Inter-Varsity Press.
But he is concerned that they must not value their attachment to the members of their families so highly that he is pushed into the background. Morris, L. (1992). The Gospel according to Matthew (pp. 267–268). W.B. Eerdmans; Inter-Varsity Press.
This has important implications for an understanding of the person of Jesus. No mere man has the right to claim a love higher than that for parents or children; it is only because he is who he is that Jesus can look for such love. The words imply that he is more than a merely human teacher and leader. Of the one who lacks this love for him he says that he is not worthy of me (GNB, “is not fit to be my disciple”). Morris, L. (1992). The Gospel according to Matthew (p. 268). W.B. Eerdmans; Inter-Varsity Press.
Even what should be the best and closest of human relationships, in the family, ought never stand in the way of serving God (v. 37) Blomberg, C. (1992). Matthew (Vol. 22, p. 181). Broadman & Holman Publishers.
Devotion and love for your family are certainly commanded in scripture (Eph 6:1–4 and 1 Tim 5:8) but it must never become absolute that one compromises their devotion to God.
Verse 38-39
Jesus demands from everyone who follows him nothing less than a death to self. Morris, L. (1992). The Gospel according to Matthew (p. 268). W.B. Eerdmans; Inter-Varsity Press.
This thinking is difficult to grasp if you’re someone who is captivated by their own desires and ambitions. The call to deny self and follow the commands of Jesus is not only inconvenient but can sound crazy or insane to one who lives for self.
The person who counts life well lost in the service of Christ will find life in the fullest sense. Morris, L. (1992). The Gospel according to Matthew (p. 269). W.B. Eerdmans; Inter-Varsity Press.
The life that matters is the life for the sake of Christ, the life that takes the same road of self-denial as Jesus did and that is concerned not with the benefit that one will be able to secure either here or hereafter, but with the service of God and of one’s fellows. Morris, L. (1992).The Gospel according to Matthew (p. 269). W.B. Eerdmans; Inter-Varsity Press.
Application:
Faith in Christ separates His followers from those who follow ungodly ways.
There’s a divide brought on by the truth of God’s Word. We should get used to it. What’s hard is when the division hits your own family or even the church.
Be prepared to face conflict in your family for being faithful to Jesus.
It should no longer come as a surprise.
You can be loyal to Christ and still love your family. Godly love is allowed to disagree and it certainly doesn’t celebrate sin.
The world doesn’t get to define Godly love and it doesn’t get to limit love to only affirming and agreeing with their choices.
God doesn’t affirm us in our wicked or sinful ways. God doesn’t celebrate or agree. God doesn’t stop being there either. God’s love is patient and waits for the prodigal to come home. When the prodigal realizes his wrong, repents, and owns his wrong, God welcomes him home. That’s love. True love disagrees, prays, and waits. Love never waivered, love just had to wait for the wayward child or spouse to realize the truth.
Is it Biblical to love Jesus more than family? Absolutely! Jesus himself in Matthew 22:37-40 said to love God is the first command and the second is to love others. The command calls for an allegiance to God first. Love is being loyal in human relationships is it not? Why would it be any different with God?
Be careful that you don’t allow your family member who opposes God to influence you. Your familial love and affection can blind you from speaking the truth and taking a stand with Christ.
Please consider this truth. Your kid or your family member is not an all-knowing, perfect God. You know the failures and faults of them well. God is worthy of our loyalty because He has no faults and does not fail.
Live and speak the truth in love. “I love you but I do not love what you are doing or the path you are on.” “I love you but not the choices you are making.” “I love you too much to agree or celebrate with these choices in your life.” “Because I love you I am being honest with you.”
Faithfully love and pray for your family while you remain loyal to Christ.
If they let you love them don’t stop. It won’t be easy. This will be one of the hardest things you will face. It’s key that you stay strong in your loyalty to Christ but gracious in your approach so that your family knows they can come to you if they change their mind.
Our faithfulness to Jesus could be a lifeline for our lost family members.
There’s still hope for your family member.
Our loyalty to Jesus can be a testimony to lead family members back to the Lord. While you are faithful to Jesus and praying for your family members, the Holy Spirit is working on their hearts to repent and believe in the Lord too.
The faithfulness of other believers can also be the lifeline. Many people who come back to the Lord do so not because of a family member but through the testimony of a spiritual family member.
Discussion:
What did God use in this sermon to speak to your heart or situation?
In what ways have you dealt with conflict in your family as a result of following Jesus?
How have you or can you show love to those with opposing beliefs in your family?
What areas do you need to improve in showing love to nonbelievers?
What other notes did you highlight or write down that you would like to share?
The most important decision you will ever make!
Are you ready to experience salvation and be transformed? We encourage you to process this decision with a strong believer and when you’re ready say a simple prayer like this from your heart: Dear God, I acknowledge and admit I have sinned. I see my need for Jesus Christ. I believe in Jesus as my Lord and Savior. I believe I am forgiven and cleansed of my sin by His death. I also believe I have eternal life because of His resurrection from the dead. I repent, I turn away from my old ways and I choose to live my life to worship you and follow Jesus, Amen!
We would love to know if you made the decision to accept this wonderful gift from God. Let us know here.
Pray Together
We hope you found this AFTER THE SERMON discussion helpful for your walk with Jesus. We pray you can find ways to apply it this week!